While plenty of happy couples can trace their meet-cute moment to an online dating app, many others find the never-ending process of likes, swipes, taps and awkward DMs that go nowhere to be exhausting 91裸聊视频� leading to a phenomenon known as 91裸聊视频渄ating app burnout.91裸聊视频�
That was the case for Marilyn Espitia, a 31-year-old freelance photo editor and photographer in California who first ventured into online dating in college, when she met her former partner and now father of her child on OkCupid.
Today she is single, and has been for about three years. While she91裸聊视频檚 still a 91裸聊视频渉opeless romantic91裸聊视频� who plans to keep using these platforms 91裸聊视频� primarily Hinge 91裸聊视频� Espitia says she91裸聊视频檒l get off an app or pause her profile when it becomes a little too much.
91裸聊视频淚t starts getting overwhelming,91裸聊视频� Espitia said.
Licensed clinical psychologist Yasmine Saad says that about 3 out of every 4 people she works with use dating apps, and anywhere between 80 to 90% have expressed feeling similar fatigue or burnout as Espitia at some point.
That91裸聊视频檚 due in part because success is never promised with online dating, regardless of whether you91裸聊视频檙e looking for a lifelong partner or casual fling.
91裸聊视频淚t91裸聊视频檚 a very difficult process for people because you invest a lot, then you receive little,91裸聊视频� said Saad, founder and CEO of Madison Park Psychological Services in New York. 91裸聊视频淚t triggers a lot of hopelessness and a lot of self-esteem issues.91裸聊视频�
Kathryn Coduto, an assistant professor of media science at Boston University who has been studying online dating since 2016, says dating app burnout is probably as old as the apps themselves, noting that people had experienced fatigue with earlier desktop-dominant platforms like eHarmony or Match.com as well.
But these days, burnout may be intensified by the fact there91裸聊视频檚 an app for just about every part of our daily lives, and that constant connectivity can be too much. Pandemic-era 91裸聊视频淶oom fatigue91裸聊视频� has spilled over into other areas of tech consumption, Coduto said, and online dating isn91裸聊视频檛 immune.
That doesn91裸聊视频檛 mean dating apps are going away anytime soon. Research shows usage has remained relatively stable over recent years.
said that reported ever using an online dating site or app as of July 2022 91裸聊视频� identical to the share found in , months before COVID-19 impacted much of daily life, .
While there was some uptick in new user downloads at the start of the pandemic, Coduto91裸聊视频檚 research found more of a spike in usage from those who already had dating apps and were spending more time on them during lockdowns. But those same lockdowns also limited in-person interactions, and the ripple effects are still being felt today.
91裸聊视频淭he pandemic increased loneliness,91裸聊视频� Saad said. 91裸聊视频淏ut it also boosted the hopelessness 91裸聊视频� because even the apps were not meeting the needs of people for socialization.91裸聊视频�
For Jennifer Stavros, a freelance journalist in Los Angeles, her time in the online dating world has 91裸聊视频渂een a mixed bag.91裸聊视频� While she91裸聊视频檚 still giving platforms like Tinder, Hinge and OkCupid a try, Stavros notes she91裸聊视频檚 experienced a recent cycle of matches that don91裸聊视频檛 go far.
91裸聊视频淚 have a conversation 91裸聊视频� and it91裸聊视频檒l go okay. (But) then it will just drop, or it91裸聊视频檒l just hit a wall somewhere,91裸聊视频� Stavros, 42, said. 91裸聊视频淚t91裸聊视频檚 not making me feel super hopeful.91裸聊视频�
Others add that it can also become easy to forget there are people on the other side of those swipes and likes, making them feel dismissed while looking for connections.
91裸聊视频淚 think that sense of swiping endlessly absolutely plays into burnout,91裸聊视频� Coduto said. 91裸聊视频淵ou91裸聊视频檙e treating people like a card deck because that91裸聊视频檚 what you91裸聊视频檙e looking at.91裸聊视频�
Yumei He, an assistant professor of management science at Tulane University91裸聊视频檚 Freeman School of Business who has also been studying online dating, said that hurtful experiences 91裸聊视频� such as being ghosted 91裸聊视频� can cause users to not trust a platform, or assume all future interactions there will end up the same way, leading them to log off and decide that 91裸聊视频渄ating is important, but my security, my self (worth) is more important.91裸聊视频�
And of course, burnout doesn91裸聊视频檛 look the same for everyone. Experiences can range widely depending on gender, sexuality, race and ethnicity. Researchers have found that women and genderqueer individuals, for example, are more likely to face harassment than men, while racial and ethnic minorities are often fetishized in online dating spaces, or experience other discrimination resulting from sexual racism.
The trauma of experiencing discrimination and other abuse on a dating app can make it very difficult to stay on a platform or trust it again, Coduto said.
Companies are increasingly navigating ways to address all of this. Hinge, for example, in April launched 91裸聊视频淗idden Words,91裸聊视频� which allows its users to filter out words, phrases and emojis in their incoming likes and comments. A Hinge spokesperson says this feature is aimed at helping vulnerable groups 91裸聊视频� particularly women, people of color and LGBTQ+ individuals 91裸聊视频� avoid unwanted interactions based on personal preferences.
Gay dating and social networking app Grindr of potential safety threats in their area, which has been particularly critical for LGBTQ+ people in countries who may face police raids and other dangers, CEO George Arison said in an interview. Users are also able to 91裸聊视频渟urf the grid91裸聊视频� on incognito mode, which is typically a paid feature, for free in some locations, he added.
91裸聊视频淎ll Grindr users are under some form of challenges in their lives,91裸聊视频� Arison said. 91裸聊视频淥ur job has always been to create a safe environment for people to be who they are.91裸聊视频�
When asked about dating app burnout overall, Arison said 91裸聊视频渨e91裸聊视频檝e not seen any fatigue of Grindr users91裸聊视频� but he noted there91裸聊视频檚 growing hunger for innovation.
That91裸聊视频檚 evidenced by the scores of updates that have recently emerged across various dating apps 91裸聊视频� from a new prompts option on Bumble, which shifts how the platform historically facilitated its 91裸聊视频渇irst move,91裸聊视频� to Tinder91裸聊视频檚 91裸聊视频淢atchmaker91裸聊视频� feature allowing friends to recommend profiles for each other and Hinge91裸聊视频檚 tests of 91裸聊视频測our turn limits91裸聊视频� to help fend off ghosting.
A handful of popular platforms, including Grindr and Tinder, say they91裸聊视频檝e started integrating artificial intelligence to help identify potential harmful messages and other safety precautions. Some are also looking at AI possibilities such as using the technology to strengthen matching algorithms or offer users91裸聊视频� message prompts and date ideas.
91裸聊视频淲e are just scratching the tip of the iceberg,91裸聊视频� said Anindya Ghose, Heinz Riehl Chair Professor of technology and marketing at New York University91裸聊视频檚 Stern School of Business, who believes AI could help alleviate burnout but transparency will be key.
Such innovations may be a way to keep people hooked on dating apps. Espitia is among those who say she91裸聊视频檇 be open to seeing platforms implement further updates 91裸聊视频� including the use of AI 91裸聊视频� if it helps improve connections with people around her.
91裸聊视频淲e91裸聊视频檙e in this new age of finding love,91裸聊视频� she said. 91裸聊视频淧eople really are like starved for love 91裸聊视频� and I think if that (technology) can help, why not?91裸聊视频�
READ ALSO: First comes Tinder, then marriage: UBCO prof examines online dating
